Monday, January 30, 2012

Women Are Not Asexual

It annoys me to the core when I hear comments such as "she done got herself knock up" or "she done got herself pregnant". Women cannot create a baby alone and it is crazy that the stigma is still only placed on the woman. Even if it is common knowledge that she is in a relationship the blame is placed solely on her especially if people view her as too young, unwed, or the couple already has a lot of children. She is also blamed if her mate has or has the potential to have large sums of money. It is as if people think women produce both sperm and eggs and creates a child alone. Don't men have a little something to do with creating a life? Are women to seek out, purchase, and put on condoms for men to ensure a baby is not created in each and every sexual encounter? Should the responsibility of preventing unwanted pregnancies be placed solely on the women? Tell me your thoughts.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Top 5 Ways NOT To Break-Up

I've complied a list of the top 5 ways to break up with your mate. Here it goes:

5. Writing a letter or giving a card to let them know it is over.
4. Asking a mutual friend to deliver the news that you want to break up.
3. Putting all of their belongings out (couples that live together).
2. Completely ignoring calls, texts, etc. from the other person.
1. Changing your relationship status to single on Facebook, tweeting about being single again on Twitter, posting a break-up video for your mate on You Tube.

If you can think of any more ways Not to break up with your partner or have a break up horror stories post a comment and share it.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Does A Good Trip "Down South" Go A Long Way?

Okay, so quite some time ago I wrote a post asking if a good bj goes a long way so I decided to ask the same question but to the women. They say women are like ovens, they need time to warm up so I know some women operate by the "you got to lick it before you stick" saying so my question for you and all other women would be does a good "trip down south" go a long way? Fellas, please feel free to give your input as well.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

To Shave Or Not To Shave; That Is The Question

Ultimately, it is up to a woman or man whether or not he/she shaves "down there", however, it seems to be much more of an issue when we're discussing a woman's genitalia. Men make is clear what they like down there and most women don't. You see, I've been told that men like a woman who's clean shaven because it makes oral sex more enjoyable for men since when a woman is clean shaven they don't have to worry about getting pubic hairs in their mouths or having to do a whole lot of work to find the clit. Here's the thing though, most men have no idea how long it takes to shave, how irritated it can get down there after shaving, or anything else for that matter that goes along with shaving. Now, I can say there are some definite benefits to shaving such as it's cleaner, it  does provide a better avenue for sexual pleasure, and some would argue it's more sanitary/is healthier although other studies say hair is there to provide a barrier to hold back bacteria and dirt which could cause infection. Now, this post isn't only about women shaving, it is also about men because believe it or not men, women can get hair in their mouths, too and not all women are fans of that. Shaving could be beneficial in that avenue as well as the fact that hair could actually be making your favorite body part appear a bit smaller than it is. So, my question to all would be, to shave or not to shave? Should you shave or not shave based solely on your partner's preference? Let me hear your thoughts.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

IS Facebook The Devil?

It's become common to hear people say that Facebook is the devil. It's full of drama, messes up relationships and breaks up friendships. It's such a big deal that some people have taken to monitoring their significant others Facebook friend list to "make sure they aren't cheating", but i say where there's a will there's a way. What's your take? Is Facebook the devil? Or would people cheat with or without it?

Monday, January 23, 2012

Should You Try To Force The Attraction?

I want to thank everyone once again for the comments left on my posts, I appreciate that so much. I'm sure many of you have been in a situation where you like everything about a person in theory, they have a lot of things going for themselves, they are fun to be around, you have good conversation with them, BUT you're just not sexually attracted to them. Maybe they're bigger than you're used to, maybe they're shorter or taller, maybe they don't have the best skin, whatever the case may be, you're just not feeling them sexually. Perhaps you're questioning whether or not you should try to make a relationship work with this person because they have a lot of qualities you want in a mate minus the physical. Well, I'm here to give you my take. If you're not attracted to the person sexually, you don't need to even go there. Nine times out of ten if you're not attracted to the person, you'll end up meeting someone you are attracted to and end up cheating. I thoroughly believe in what Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger says all the time on her show "the pecker does the picking". Now, of course there are ALWAYS exceptions to every rule so maybe you will be able make things work without the sexual attraction, but remember that's the exception NOT the rule so it doesn't work that way for everybody. All I want you to do is think long and hard about what you're doing before you do it because you definitely don't want to string someone along if you're not interested in being with them. Treat people how you want to be treated. What's your take on this?

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Does Being Intoxicated Make Sex Better?

So... Sex is already supposed to be fun and exciting, BUT some believe that being under the influence of certain substances can enhance the pleasure. Now, I will say that if the sex is good and is even better when you are intoxicated and it works for you, do you. However, if you find that you have to be intoxicated in order to engage in sex with your partner, you need to leave that alone. I can say that in my own experience, when a man is "under the influence", he does seem to be a bit more adventurous, and sometimes even lasts longer. I don't know why that is, but I'm certain everyone who's been in this type of situation has his/her own opinion about it. I'd like to think it is a placebo effect, that you have all that you need to make sex as exciting and pleasurable as you want it to be, however, you feel invincible while under the influence, meaning you don't really need whatever it is that you're using you just think you do. What is your take on this? Does being intoxicated REALLY make sex better?

Friday, January 20, 2012

Why The Hell You Keep Having His Kids???

 First let me thank those that have left comments on my posts, I truly enjoy hearing your thoughts. You're greatly appreciated. Alright, so I did a post a while back bearing the question should you stay for the kids. Within this post I was asking for people's opinions on this topic as it seems to be a tough situation that many people have gone through and may even be going through at this very moment, but another situation crossed my mind and I thought I'd share it. This situation would be when a woman meets a man she knows is no good either from the door or very soon after getting to know him, yet they decide to get pregnant by him in the hopes that he'll step up and changes his ways/be a man. Now, the saying goes "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me" and I'd definitely say I agree. We're all given a free pass to be a fool "in love" at least once, but when a child is a part of the equation, honey, you have to get it together. I've heard some women using the "I want my kids to have a real family" line, those who use the "I want all my kids to have the same father" excuse, and the oh, so tired "But I love him" plea. While I agree that you can not see all that goes on when you're on the outside looking in, if this man has humiliated you by leaving you outside in the freezing cold crying on his porch, cheated on you with countless hood chicks, stolen from you, lied to you like there's no tomorrow, or denied being the father of your child publicly on any occasion, why the hell would you even want to have another child by him?  PLEASE use the sense God gave you and leave him alone and PRETTY PLEASE don't have any more kids by him. We all want the best for our kids and we'd all like for our families to stay together, but if he's giving you more hell than Satan could ever calculate in his mind, LET HIM BE ON HIS MERRY LITTLE WAY.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Anal Sex... When HE'S Receiving

So... Not everyone is open to talking about and much less DOING anal sex, BUT I want to talk about it... again. LOL So, here we go. There was a conversation going on where we discussed whether or not a man wanting to experience anal sex with his girl, with him receiving that is, made him gay. Now, on one hand I would certainly be inclined to say that he may have "gay tendencies", but according to some studies, this may be entirely false. I mean, after all, they did say that just because a woman has lesbian fantasies doesn't mean she is lesbian. I'm not entirely sure what my take on this is mainly because I feel or I've learned rather that you can not put everybody in the same little box. What arouses or excites you may be totally inappropriate and gross to someone else. What you enjoy in bed may totally turn someone else off. Does his wanting his girl to use dildos or vibrators or anal beads or even a finger make him gay? I don't know. Should you be worried if your man suddenly decides he wants to try being penetrated in his anus? Can't say. But I will say this, as open minded as I am, this is not something that would fly with me just because I just feel that certain roles shouldn't be crossed. In my mind, the woman is the ONLY one who should be getting ANY penetration and the man is the one who gives it to her. Now, if this is something that you and your man engage in and enjoy, then by all means, do your thing, honey. I'm not trying to knock you, I'm simply saying it's not something I'm into and it's not something I'd want my man to be into. So, you tell me your thoughts. Is a man who enjoys being the recipient of anal sex homosexual? Or do you think there just aren't enough open minded people who can accept that a man CAN like anal sex and NOT be gay?

I've added a video to youtube, check it out! Here's the link! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mS3J1LwKZsM&feature=share

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Who Said Valentine's Day Was For Women?

Valentine's Day will be here before you know it and I'd like to say a few words on the event. I've always considered myself a hopeless romantic as those of you who've been following my blog already know and I like to wine and dine my man just like I want him to wine and dine me. That's just how I feel, however, as previously stated in another post, a lot of women don't share my opinion. Now, Valentine's Day isn't really a national holiday or anything, but it is considered a special day. One that is set aside for you to show that special someone in your life just how much you love and appreciate them, BUT many women feel it's the day that men are supposed to spend tons of money on them to prove they deserve them. I TOTALLY disagree. Valentine's Day is supposed to be to show that special someone you care, and that DOES include women buying or creating or whatever it is you want to do for your mate. Men aren't the only ones who are supposed to be coming out of pocket, setting up romantic evenings, or cooking a fancy meal that day. Valentine's Day is for everyone and although I'm sure most men aren't going to be too fond of the idea of receiving a teddy bear or roses, I'm certain you could find something masculine enough to let your man know you care. All I'm trying to say here is that women have to give what they want to receive. If you want romance, be willing to give romance. If you want him to spice things up, be willing to do things to spice things up on your end as well. And with that being said, let me also be sure to say that you shouldn't ONLY do nice things for your mate on special occasions. Valentine's Day IS set aside to show your mate how much you care, but it shouldn't be the only time you do so.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

"The Bigger The Girl, The Better The Personality"???

So, I'm watching True Life on MTV yesterday and this episode is on called "I'm A Chubby Chaser". Okay, that's cool and everything until this one guy on the show says "Big girls aren't supposed to come with drama" and then later on in the show he says "The bigger the girl, the better the personality." I'm appalled beyond belief by these statements as I feel that is so discriminatory and not only that is's like wait, not only are women being discriminated against based on color, "Black girls are too angry all the time" "White girls are easier to handle" "Asian girls REALLY know how to take care of a man" for example, but we're also discriminated against based on our body types? I mean, really? Oh, and let me not forget that we're also discriminated against based on our looks as far as what's considered to be beautiful to others "Pretty girls suck in bed" "Ugly girls are awesome in bed because they have to REALLY try to keep a man" for example. Seriously??? Do women even do that for men? Yeah, I know we judge based on race for the size of the penis and sometimes even for certain personality traits, but is it even to this extreme? I don't know about you all, but I just couldn't even fathom this concept. It's like if you're thin and black, you're the worst of the worst, but if you're big and white, you're the best of the best? Is that how it works? Is there even really any truth to this?

Monday, January 2, 2012

Behind Every Good Man, There's A Good Woman

Sorry it took so long for an edit, but here goes... Okay, so every knows or should know the story behind President Barack and First Lady Michelle Obama's relationship. In a nutshell, she saw the potential for great things in him and decided to stand by him while he reached that potential. See, I'm a believer in the saying "behind every good man there's a good woman" because have you noticed that there's never been a single president in office? Or that when a man gets ready to run for any type of political position, he's married? Even if the pastor of a church is single, people are skeptical. Here's my point, women were put here to be a man's helpmate, it's not good for man to be alone and God said that. Women can be the driving force that a man needs to push him to the limit, to get him to be all that he can be. Women are often times just what a man needs in order to reach his full potential, just take a step back and look at all the great men in history. Am I saying that men just HAVE to have a woman in their lives in order to do great things? Of course not, there are plenty of great men who are single and there are even some who had the wrong woman behind them and they ended up going down the wrong path. But what I am saying is that we, as women, and even more as black women have to learn to look at more than what a man has to offer us or what he can do for us. Yes, we're strong and yes, we are educated, independent, etc, but if we didn't have someone pushing us, whether if be family, friends, or only ourselves, would we be all those things? Learn to look at a person and see the potential, see them trying and realize that just because he wasn't rich or educated or whatever it is that you want him to be when you met him, that doesn't mean he will always be in that position. And let me not leave without saying a man who doesn't have anything and isn't trying to get anything is not what you need, but if you're employed, have a degree, and feel you are successful, don't knock a man who has a job just because he doesn't have a degree or isn't working a job you feel is suitable. You have to redefine a "good" man. At least he has a job and is trying to do for himself, that's a lot more than can be said for a lot of other brothers, so that makes him a good man.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Starting Fresh

It's 2012 and thank God we're here to see it! It's been a while and I hope you guys missed me like I've missed you. I just wanted to let you all know that I'm still here and I'm still writing. I'll have new topics up for you soon. I'm starting fresh and for those of you whose year wasn't up to par last year, I hope you are, too.

Peace and blessings,
Kina